Maureen Walker's blog: An Artist's Journey

Last night I had fun with the temporary drawing exercise. With a torch and a mobile phone I came up with the following;

This was a fun exercise. The above inadvertently resembles a skull and crossbones.

My studio, a converted living room, where my easel is set up and awaiting my attention. The first week as an OCA Drawing student has seen me occupied with everything but actual drawing practice. With thoughts of my yet-to-be-approved Maintenance Loan Application in progress I have been working through a long admin to-do-list including working on this blog – tick. The potential for procrastination is huge as the end of the first week rapidly approaches. It’s the weekend now – workaday concerns are at the back of my mind and a vodka and diet coke beckons. But before I can kick back completely, I need to make a mark. Any kind of a mark.

This exhibition on Thursday 17th October 2019 was held at the Art and Design building at the University of Hertfordshire’s College Lane Campus. We arrived late. The organisers were just asking the artists involved how they felt about ”drawing” as a verb. Coincidentally, the subject of ”temporary drawings” came up at this point. Lucy Brown, exhibiting the ”Extended Line” piece, mentioned drawing with a bicycle wheel through puddles in the rain. I say coincidentally as this is one of the initial warm-up exercises in the Drawing 1 course which I am about to start with Online College of the Arts.

I must confess to feeling more than a little intimidated by the environment with its high, well lit whitewashed walls and the ”artists’ speak” in evidence as we (myself and my partner) arrived. The artists – MAs and PHDs – together with the ambience of the exhibiton space put me in mind of my first experience of Art School back in 1985. One of the artists mentioned that her father was an architect. It reminded me of the gulf I felt there to have been between my working class background – a bricklayer dad, mum was a dinner lady – and my largely middle class student peer group. Consequently I allowed this to lead me to become an Art School Drop-out at 18.

The space at UH was partly taken up by a large 3D Drawing by Rosana Antoli which was reminiscent of an Antony Gormley piece I had seen at the RA only recently. Though that had taken up an entire room. This drawing made up of black rubber tubing (or a man made substitute) made to leap off the wall leaving an interesting shadow behind.

I attempted to gauge the emotion expressed in Jane Grisewood’s mark making in her ”Blind Drawing” exhibit. I was torn between how I would have felt drawing this way before a group of strangers and thinking that the nature of her lines suggested she was fairly calm in her approach.

I liked the way that she appeared to give equal attention to the graphite held in either hand and used her whole body to draw across the entire space available to her – showing an awareness of the space in spite of having her eyes closed the entire time.

There was an animated video of a curious 3D figure within a virtual studio type space performing rhythmic movements something akin to a martial arts Kata. This piece, by the artist George Eksts was very hypnotic. Unfortunately I have no stills of this available.

Also included within the exhibition space were installations by the artist Andrea Wright. Attending this event helped me to see that drawing was more or could be more than simply dragging a pencil across a piece of cartridge paper.

1) Preparing to study in higher education.
How do I feel about my decision to study the arts?

Of course I feel excited about studying the arts. It has been an ambition of mine to finally be able to call myself a professional artist. Having said this, I have some concerns. Am I up to the task? It’s true that I don’t always finish what I’ve started. But on the other hand it’s possible that this is due to the fact that the things I have hitherto embarked upon have been cheaper alternatives of lesser importance to me than pursuing an Art Degree

At the age of 18 I had started along a similar path at Foundation level with a view to gaining a degree place. At that time I had been following the expectations of relatives and teachers from whom I did not wish to receive expressions of disappointment. This is not a great reason for study. As a teenager, the hangover of subsequently dropping out due to lack of enthusiasm or self-belief, but not due to lack of ability, stayed with me during the intervening years. Now, at the age of 52 I hope to find myself with the ideal mental attitude towards study at this level. This is due largely to my domestic and emotional security and stability. But also because I have the time and the space in which to work and play; an ideal environment for creativity.

Being generally a happier person, one more comfortable in her skin, for me equates to better concentration and self-confidence. These were all things which I lacked all those years ago. I now embark upon this challenge with a sense of adventure, of curiosity and with the belief that I can and will make mistakes but that is all okay.

Evaluation of the above;

I was aware that I may have been drifting off the subject. I’m not sure whether this is okay or not. I like what I have written. I could have written more. Indeed, I had 25 words spare. But I have spent 25 minutes on that particular task and was eager to move on. It was a useful piece of writing because I reflected on the driving force behind my desire to study and found myself asking relevant questions which had been on my mind without my realising it.

It is 12.15 on Sunday 13th October 2019 and I eagerly await the outcome of a maintenance loan application for a Drawing Degree with OCA. The fee loan is already in place so I have applied to the college and my start date should hopefully be tomorrow. In the meantime I have been busy. The following is an example of what I’ve been up to.

This is a study of ”Gloria”, a maquette I discovered at a car boot sale last year and purchased for a fiver. I used wax resist with cheap children’s crayons, watercolour paint, willow charcoal and blue pastel. The plinth she is sitting on is not carefully executed and her breast needs more shading, but otherwise I enjoyed using wax resist having been inspired by a visit to Perry Green near Much Hadham in Hertfordshire and seeing Henry Moore’s drawing exhibition there.